Leah sat by the window in solitude. It was pitch dark outside. The moon was nowhere to be seen, probably hiding itself behind the clouds. There weren't even stars but still, she kept the windows open and look to the sky as if she was waiting for someone. Like Wendy's mom waiting for her children to return from Neverland.
The only difference was, she had no family to wait for. She was by herself since the she was 6.
The spring wind blew gently through her dark auburn hair which I have always admired. Her pale hands are holding on to her mug of coffee which she kept using over and over again although the handle had broke off from the mug. I almost trash it but she was hysterical when I did it. I was horrified by that side of her that I've never seen. She said it was a gift from an old friend. I was curious of that old friend cause out of all her friends, she never mentioned about him.
I later felt guilty for underestimating the mug.
It turned out that the old friend passed away when they were 15. They became close friends as they spend months together in a hospital. They both had cancer but the old friend didn't survive it. Tragic isn't it, her life was?
But I have never seen her cry. Never. Not even once. In fact, she was a bubbly girl who never fails to make everyone around her smile. She was not an absolute beauty, but there was warmth from the way she smiles to the way she speaks that made her admired by many.
And out of the many men, she married Daniel whom she met at a bookshop. Romantic isn't it? But it wasn't a pleasant love at first sight. Their first encounter was when a book fell onto her head when the man was trying to pick a book from the upper shelf. It was indeed a painful first encounter for both parties. Nevertheless, not only the book fell but they also fell for each other after a while, with a couple encounters at the bookshop and cups of warm coffee.
Talking about coffee,"Why are you drinking coffee this late at night?", I expressed my concern.
She didn't look at me, as I expected.
"I know you're sad but Leah, you shouldn't torture yourself like this."
She was holding back her tears, like she always do all her life.
Her life was tragic indeed. Her family, her friend and then...
Daniel.
It's been a week since the love of her life died due to a car crash. It was an unexpected departure. No warning, no signs, he promised to buy her the groceries and suddenly police ended up in front of her house with the bad news.
"Daniel...", she muttered to herself while staring at a particular book.
"... I wish I knew." She smiled but there was a sound of despair.
"This book, its the one that fell isn't it?", I asked a question that I already knew the answer to. For One More Day by Mitch Albom lied on a coffee table beside her.
"Aren't you feeling suspicious that your first love might actually, allegedly throw the book at you so that you would notice?"
There was only silence. Her eyes were still focused at the book.
"I'm sorry, Leah. I really do."
"Why are you doing this to me? Stop. Please", she uttered as she faced the window.
"I'm sorry. You've lost your family. You've lost a friend. You've gone through painful episodes and I though I could be here for you..."
She cuts, "Daniel", and she bursted into tears and fell to her knees. This was the first time I saw her crying. Sorrow filled the void that was empty since the day Daniel was gone.
I gazed at her longingly. I wish I could hug her, provide her the warmth she used to give me. I wish I could make her beam like she used to make me. I want to stop her suffering.
I wish.
but I couldn't.
"... and it turns out... ", I choked up.
"..it turns out that I'm also leaving you. I'm sorry Leah, I can't be there for you. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. If only I was more careful, maybe, just maybe I could be here for you"
"I'm sorry. I love you"
I wish, she could hear me. I wish she was actually talking to me. But all I could do was to see her from afar, invisibly. Like how I used to watch her coming through the door of the bookshop every week and she never fail to look stunning each time. I looked at her going through the second-hand books attentively until I managed to pick up the courage to talk to her, by allegedly dropping the book; but I really did not mean for it to fall on her head. I even managed to find excuses so that I could meet her frequently.
Who knew she, who was beloved by everyone, would accept me. Marrying her was a blessing, a dream come true.
I wish, you knew this.
I wish, for one more day, so that I could tell you this. But I'm gone now. I'm gone.
I'm sorry Leah, for I could not give the happily ever after ending you've always sought for, after all the hardships you've been through.
That day will come, you deserve it, but not now. Not with me.
And she lives happily ever after, don't lose faith on this Leah. Be strong, like you've always been.
This might sound a bit cheesy or too lovey-dovey for some of you and its really unlike me. This story was not planned ahead actually. I was bored and there was a couple of great movie soundtracks (try A New Day Beckons by Anthony Partos from the movie Sherpa) playing in the background so I came up with this and it turned out as a melodrama. Thanks for reading this decent piece anyway and I wish you a happily ever after, Inshaallah.
The only difference was, she had no family to wait for. She was by herself since the she was 6.
The spring wind blew gently through her dark auburn hair which I have always admired. Her pale hands are holding on to her mug of coffee which she kept using over and over again although the handle had broke off from the mug. I almost trash it but she was hysterical when I did it. I was horrified by that side of her that I've never seen. She said it was a gift from an old friend. I was curious of that old friend cause out of all her friends, she never mentioned about him.
I later felt guilty for underestimating the mug.
It turned out that the old friend passed away when they were 15. They became close friends as they spend months together in a hospital. They both had cancer but the old friend didn't survive it. Tragic isn't it, her life was?
But I have never seen her cry. Never. Not even once. In fact, she was a bubbly girl who never fails to make everyone around her smile. She was not an absolute beauty, but there was warmth from the way she smiles to the way she speaks that made her admired by many.
And out of the many men, she married Daniel whom she met at a bookshop. Romantic isn't it? But it wasn't a pleasant love at first sight. Their first encounter was when a book fell onto her head when the man was trying to pick a book from the upper shelf. It was indeed a painful first encounter for both parties. Nevertheless, not only the book fell but they also fell for each other after a while, with a couple encounters at the bookshop and cups of warm coffee.
Talking about coffee,"Why are you drinking coffee this late at night?", I expressed my concern.
She didn't look at me, as I expected.
"I know you're sad but Leah, you shouldn't torture yourself like this."
She was holding back her tears, like she always do all her life.
Her life was tragic indeed. Her family, her friend and then...
Daniel.
It's been a week since the love of her life died due to a car crash. It was an unexpected departure. No warning, no signs, he promised to buy her the groceries and suddenly police ended up in front of her house with the bad news.
"Daniel...", she muttered to herself while staring at a particular book.
"... I wish I knew." She smiled but there was a sound of despair.
"This book, its the one that fell isn't it?", I asked a question that I already knew the answer to. For One More Day by Mitch Albom lied on a coffee table beside her.
"Aren't you feeling suspicious that your first love might actually, allegedly throw the book at you so that you would notice?"
There was only silence. Her eyes were still focused at the book.
"I'm sorry, Leah. I really do."
"Why are you doing this to me? Stop. Please", she uttered as she faced the window.
"I'm sorry. You've lost your family. You've lost a friend. You've gone through painful episodes and I though I could be here for you..."
She cuts, "Daniel", and she bursted into tears and fell to her knees. This was the first time I saw her crying. Sorrow filled the void that was empty since the day Daniel was gone.
I gazed at her longingly. I wish I could hug her, provide her the warmth she used to give me. I wish I could make her beam like she used to make me. I want to stop her suffering.
I wish.
but I couldn't.
"... and it turns out... ", I choked up.
"..it turns out that I'm also leaving you. I'm sorry Leah, I can't be there for you. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. If only I was more careful, maybe, just maybe I could be here for you"
"I'm sorry. I love you"
I wish, she could hear me. I wish she was actually talking to me. But all I could do was to see her from afar, invisibly. Like how I used to watch her coming through the door of the bookshop every week and she never fail to look stunning each time. I looked at her going through the second-hand books attentively until I managed to pick up the courage to talk to her, by allegedly dropping the book; but I really did not mean for it to fall on her head. I even managed to find excuses so that I could meet her frequently.
Who knew she, who was beloved by everyone, would accept me. Marrying her was a blessing, a dream come true.
I wish, you knew this.
I wish, for one more day, so that I could tell you this. But I'm gone now. I'm gone.
I'm sorry Leah, for I could not give the happily ever after ending you've always sought for, after all the hardships you've been through.
That day will come, you deserve it, but not now. Not with me.
And she lives happily ever after, don't lose faith on this Leah. Be strong, like you've always been.
This might sound a bit cheesy or too lovey-dovey for some of you and its really unlike me. This story was not planned ahead actually. I was bored and there was a couple of great movie soundtracks (try A New Day Beckons by Anthony Partos from the movie Sherpa) playing in the background so I came up with this and it turned out as a melodrama. Thanks for reading this decent piece anyway and I wish you a happily ever after, Inshaallah.
