No Regrets

Have you ever hope that you could rewind the time so badly and did the right thing?

That's what I felt when I was in Form 1.

At that time, I moved  to Maahad Hamidiah after three months at SAMTTAJ. I don't know why, but I just move without telling my SAMTTAJ friends, at all.

And I felt really guilty about it.

Then, I reached Maahad, expecting to see Maziah, my best friend during primary school. Coincidently, I was put in the same class with her. I was really happy because everyone were strangers but her. The others did try to be friendly with me but still, I feel lonely.

Maziah seemed so excited too when she saw me. She helped me with everything. Unfortunately, I didn't get the hostel offer, YET. So, I became 'budak luar' for a few days.

I was alone. Completely alone, I felt like I wanna cry. But when I saw my mother, fetching me after school, my heart scream, "I'm out of here!". At home, I begged my mother that I wanna go back to SAMTTAJ but she refused. My father already paid the fee and she said that I'll get used to my new school someday.

Well, I don't have any choice but to stay at Maahad.

I really hated myself for moving to Maahad at that time.

Why did I decide to move? I really hated myself for taking that decision.

And there was this morning, I reached Maahad quite early. I sat in the class alone. I looked around the class 1 Abu Bakar and shut my eyes for a few minutes, hoping that all of these were just dreams. All of these will transform to my old class in SAMTTAJ.

Hoping that my old friends will surround me.

I opened my eyes.

Nothing change. It's still 1 Abu Bakar, not 1 Ikhlas that I hoped for.

I cried.

I cried to sleep. Then, I heard a knock. I woke up and it was my classmate. "Perhimpunan.."

"Oh, ok ", I answered, flustered. I dragged myself to the assembly feeling miserable.

But hey, it wasn't really that bad

Now, I'm already in Form 4 in Maahad. Form 1 was just immature times.

Alhamdulilah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulilah.

I've got a lot more friends, even best friends and I learned a lot here.

We can't stay put in one place right? This world is meant to be explored. (What I'm talking about? I don't know, it somehow doesn't make much sense though with my story)

I don't regret it at all.
But, yeah, sometimes I do wonder what if I didn't move in the first place?

What happened is the best one.

Well, we plan Allah decide.  Allah is the best planner after all. He don't give what we want but what we need.

So, that's all for now.

Unfortunately...

Superb Gathering!

Alhamdulillah~

After 3 painful weeks of EXAM!

2 weeks of works and boredom!

...I finally can release my pressure and do something fun

...in 4 IBS class gathering

...at Sunway Pyramid!

First, we went for skating. Already used to it, but this time I got a lot of 'students' to help and teach.

Lot more falls. Haha. 

Careful! IBS troops ready!

Then, we went for Laser Tag. It's like a paintball but a modern one. Not painful and you won't 'die'. This was really fun. Really! Try it! We went for Girls against Boys.

Still wondering who won though...

Gosh! We were so hungry. So, we makan-makan at Pizza Hut. 

Thanks everyone for coming and made my day filled with fun and laugh. Hope we can meet again and have a lot more fun!

*Credits to my brother, Afiq for being the photographer.

Dilema Budak Sekolah Agama

This is a survey that I've just done at....... .a group in Facebook.

I've done a poll and these are their responses. (it's a long post, so just bear with it)

FIRST! (26 votes)

• "Rasa bersalah buat benda lagha tapi.......... buat jugak" 

Komen:  These days, there's too much entertainment, social webs, it's hard for us not to involve. And it's because they want to follow the trend. They don't want to be called old-fashioned. This is what I'm facing too right now.

It's okay to do these things BUT, not too excessive until you become obsessed with artists, songs and others (but that's what happening). Until it disturbs our studies! And worse, our relationship with Allah! Na'uzubillah.  Berpada-pada,ok!
 If dah rasa bersalah tu, kurangkan! 

SECOND~(23 votes)

• "Dipandang baik oleh semua orang , tapi sebenarnya kita ni takdelah baik sangat"

Komen: Of course! You're studying in an Islamic school and you're studying about Islam. Islam teaches you to be good. Of course-lah you have to be good! Of course-lah orang pandang kita ni baik.

Memanglah kita ni tak baik sangat. Solat tak khusyuk, Surah Yasin pun kadang-kadang sangkut. Ber-twitting, Facebook sampai pagi.

Nobody's perfect. So, with those impression, why don't you take it as a motivation to try to improve yourself jadi lebih baik. Right?


THIRD...(14 votes)

• "Di'cop' ustaz/ustazah/imam muda dan yang sewaktu dengannya" 

Komen: Biasalah! Memanglah kadang-kadang rasa macam nak bagi buku lima dekat pipi gebu mereka but, it's better that they call you ustaz/ustazah than mat rempit, right?

Ni lebih kurang je dengan yang lagi satu. Take this to also motivate yourself to be as good as ustaz/ustazah. Maybe better than that! 

• "Tak rasa macam budak sekolah agama pun"

Komen: Kenapa ye? Tak rasa macam budak sekolah agama ke, tak rasa macam orang Islam?

Renung-renungkan. Don't blame the others. Think about it. Improve yourself, not as a 'budak sekolah agama' but as a better MUSLIM.

FORTH! (9 votes)

• "Tak dapat nak jawab soalan agama dan B. Arab bila ditanya"

Komen: That means you have a lot to learn and......pay attention during the class! 

Tapi, kalau soalan agama atau B. Arab tahap mega tu, boleh dimaafkanlah kot.

FIFTH...(7 votes)

• "Nak tegur ke tak nak?"

Komen: We are 'budak sekolah agama'. So, we have some advanced religious knowledge than 'budak sekolah biasa'. And when we saw someone did a mistake like in solat or aurat kan. There's always a voice in our head saying "Nak tegur ke tak nak?".

And it's harder if it's a stranger. Hardest if it's someone who is older than you.

And another voice came "Nanti dia fikir aku nak bajet pandai" or "Nanti dia fikir aku saja nak malukan dia"

And you end up.....

Not good. 
Siapa lagi nak tegur kalau bukan kita?!
But our mentality keeps us from it! Arggh! These voices are so freaking bad! Don't listen to them! Let the felling of guiltiness of not approaching the person haunts you~

"Nanti forever dia salah, SEBAB AKU TAK TEGUR.....pastu nanti aku kena soal kat akhirat....pastu..aku"

So, 'tegur' that person!

It's in the 5th place means they're not really haunted by this dilemma. That means........they do approach the people if they did a mistake OR they actually don't and think that this is not a thing to be concerned about (not good~). I'm not even sure.

Dan kalau nak tegur tu, tegurlah dengan berhikmah! Jangan main tegur melulu!

SIXTH~ (6 votes)

• "Jadi harapan dalam kalangan family/saudara kerana satu-satunya belajar agama"

Komen: Wow! Berat ni! Alhamdulillah, Allah nak suruh kau bimbing family/ saudara-saudara kau tu.

It's really a big responsiblity especially when they put high hopes to you. The 6 person who votes for this are guys. And yes, men are meant to lead.

So, GANBATTE, guys! Lead them!


SEVENTH! (5 votes)

• "Terasa sukar nak dakwah family/friends/saudara"

Komen: Almost the same with the above but, this one is somehow did out of responsibility and voluntarily and not because of high hopes people give. But, yeah it's almost the same. Dakwah memang kadang-kala agak sukar, especially to people who knows us. Especially when we are the ONLY ONE who is from 'sekolah agama'.

Be strong. Me, too, is facing this dilemma. And I find it hard. But I've tried, a bit and I'm still trying.

EIGTH... (2 votes)

• "Terasa awkward di tempat awam bila pakai tudung labuh/jubah apatah lagi bila diperhati"

Komen: I thought many would choose this, but fortunately, just two votes. Ok, firstly, there's no need to be so awkward. Ok, yeah it's kinda awkward to wear those but try to think that "Kau tutup aurat, buat apa nak malu?". You should be PROUD!

• "Kau?! Budak sekolah agama? Tak cayalah!

Komen: Ahah! Maybe it's the way you talk! Hey! Jangan mencarut! Improve your akhlak. Akhlak tu mencerminkan diri seseorang tu macam mana.

• "Sukar untuk socialize, lagi-lagi dengan yang berlainan jantina"

Komen: Well, this one. It always happen with old friends, cousins, no matter same gender or opposite gender because of different backgrounds. 

But in the 'sekolah agama' circle, it's always with the opposite gender, well, to certain people because this one got only two votes.

It's good that 'sekolah agama' environment didn't affect our social life BUT I'm afraid that we became too social because of the limit of socializing with the opposite gender in the school. That's what usually happening in social webs. 

NINTH, AND LAST~ (1 vote)

•  "Dipandang rendah, dicondemn dan yang sewaktu dengannya"

Komen: This only got one vote but still, we need to pay attention to it

Being condemned and underestimated by the community because we 'budak sekolah agama'? Just ignore them but if they condemn us because "Budak sekolah agama sekarang  ni sama je macam budak tak belajar dekat sekolah agama". Wohoh! That means we  really to fix our image as the people who are studying Islam. 

Not just fixing the image as a 'budak sekolah agama' but as a MUSLIM who is studying Qur'an, and Hadith! 

But there are 'budak sekolah agama' who is being underestimate by 'budak sekolah agama' themselves. True story, bro. This happens because of the judgement and impression towards a person. Not 'alim' and something like that. So immature...

CONCLUSION

Us, people around us and trend. That's what made us having these to face these dilemma. 

These days trend: fashion, entertainment, technology and ....bla bla bla. Most of it are against Islam's teachings. Too late. It's already become a part of our community's life.

People around us have been getting used to this trend and Islam's teachings become estranged. 

And we, 'budak sekolah agama' are trying to practice Islam in this community. But Islam is starting to secularize in our community without we realizing.

And we struggle, dilemmas come one by one. 

At the end, it all depend on ourselves and Allah. Our mentality, strength and faith.

And these dilemmas, shouldn't be faced by 'budak sekolah agama' only but by MUSLIMS. All Muslims suppose to sense this!

But Islam have been isolated day by day. 

So, it all goes to us 'budak sekolah agama' because we are still teenagers. Teenage is the age at its golden but many misused it to enjoy the worldly life.  

Teenagers are the hope of society, future's leaders. 

It all goes to us!  

Thanks for reading this decent post. Hope it's informational. Wassalam

Well, Raya~

Ramadhan dah habis dah... 
entah dapat jumpa lagi ke dengan dia tahun depan...

Shawal dah datang balik. So,.....

Selamat Hari Raya!

As usual, let the pictures tell the story!

One happy family!

Kami lima beradik

Cak!

Bak bidadari~

Di Kg. Bharu

So, dah makan sedap-sedap raya ni, jangan lupa puasa enam!

And a question! Which raya is the best? This year or last year? And why? In the comments section.

When Will it End?

It's Ramadhan. Tapi...

Kekejaman, di Syria.

Protes, di Mesir

Tak berpenghujung, di Palestin

Dan banyak lagi, Libya, Morocco.....

SYRIA...
It's been very long since it started. Since the Arab Spring.
Bashar's regime against his own citizens. Many lives have been taken. It's Ramadhan, but still, the brutality doesn't get any lesser.

When will it end? Only Allah knows.

 EGYPT
Ketika Mubarak jatuh, dan Morsi mengambil alih, they thought they've achieve freedom and victory.

But...there are still minorities who don't want Morsi. Minorities? No one thought that...
....it'll happens once again, another revolution.

Jatuhnya Presiden Morsi. Diambil alih oleh Abdul Fattah Al-Sisi, digelar Firaun moden. Penyokong Morsi menentang pengambilalihan ini, memihak kepada Morsi. Lalu, revolusi, protes semakin berleluasa. 'Perang' berlaku di antara yang memihak dan yang menentang.

Makin banyak nyawa yang terkorban. Siapa yang akan menang?

PALESTINE
Palestine, an open-air prisoner. Prisoner of the innocents. Caged by ruthless Zionists Israelis. Being bombed and shot for nothing. Being oppressed and lands taken.

Once, there were supply given by Egypt through Rafah and tunnels. That were the only connection they have with the outside world. But, since the fall of Morsi, the tunnels were collapsed, Rafah was closed by the Egyptians military themselves.

Now, they're stuck, lack of supply for oil, food and other basic needs.

But, Allah will always help his servants. Allah dah janji, Palestine will be free.

"We know too well that our freedom is incomplete without the freedom of Palestinians" - Nelson Mandela

Tengok, orang kafir pun cakap macam tu.

May Allah bless them, especially in this holy month of Ramadhan. Grant them shahid, Ya Allah. They're my brothers. They're my sisters. May victory and happiness be granted for Your faithful servants.
Friends, let's pray for them. Doa itu senjata orang Islam. Orang kafir mana ada senjata ni.

Let's pray for them!!